Alone in the Desert (but with angelic beings and maybe a goddess)
Contemplating the part where Hagar is sent into the wilderness, creating a new poetic form, and how to write 30 poems in 30 days
Welcome back to The Life of H: Sarah, Reimagined. This is where I share poems and reflections about the life of the Biblical Matriarch, Sarah, and the lessons I’ve learned from taking a deep dive into her story.
Here’s what’s in store in today’s post:
Why you’re getting a double dose of poetry this week … and my secret to writing 30 poems in 30 days
The story behind this week’s poems, including a revelation about God’s pronouns and the creation of a new poetic form
Not one but two audio poems
Info on upcoming writing workshops and the reason I’m writing 30 poems in 30 days
Like I said, it’s a big week for Sarah! So settle and start reading.
Sarah’s big week
In the weekly cycle of 54 Torah readings (parshot) there is one that bears Sarah’s name, and it is the one we read this week: “The Life of Sarah.”
That title, is also what inspired the title of this project, “The Life of H: Sarah, Reimagined.”
I talk about why in an earlier post.
In honor of Sarah’s big week … today’s post offers a double-helping of poetry!
Two poems in one post!
Yes, today you are receiving two poems instead of just one! Partly that’s because I’m about a week-and-a-half into my annual 30-poems in 30-days fundraising challenge, in which I write a poem a day in November to raise funds for a local nonprofit that supports new immigrants. (For more on that and to donate to this worthy cause, scroll down).
You might be wondering how one manages to write a poem a day for an entire month. Well, having attempted this feat at least a half dozen times, I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve:
The poems don’t have to be good. They just have to be poems.
The poems don’t have to be long. I tend to write a good number of haiku poems in November.
The words don’t have to be original. No, I’m not talking about plagiarism; I’m talking about legitimate poetic forms including Centos, Found Poems, and Erasure Poems (to name just a few) that recycle pre-existing texts into new poems.
This year, I also (re)discovered the pantoum, a poetic form that consists of a pattern of repeating lines. Thanks to the repetition, you only need to come up with 8 poetic lines to write a 16-line poem.
I combined the idea of writing a found poem with the pantoum form and used verses from Sarah, Abraham, and Hagar’s story to come up with a series of poems, two of which I’m sharing today.
Maybe I’ve created a new form in the process:
Pantoum + Found Poem = a new hybrid form … the Fountoum? Pantound?
The two pantoums that are featured below are based on the same biblical passage but take place several millennia apart.
The verses I chose to write from appear in Genesis Chapter 21, verses 14-17. This is a painful and heartbreaking moment in the story just after Sarah demands that Hagar, who gave birth to a son for Abraham, be sent away with the boy into the desert.
Sarah gives the command, God backs her up, and Abraham packs up Hagar and her son Ishmael and sends them away.
I borrowed, and lightly edited, 8 lines from that story, then combined them into the 16-line pantoum, “He Sent Her Away,” that you can listen to below.
God’s pronouns
As you will notice when you listen to the poem, “He Sent Her Away” (below) I chose to use the pronoun “We” instead of “He” to refer to God.
Here’s why: The Hebrew word Elohim in the original text is commonly translated as God, and associated with the third-person singular pronoun He.
But the word Elohim is plural (gods), and in ancient times referred to majestic or heavenly beings such as angels and various deities, including the goddess Astarte.
Let’s pause there to take that in!
Yes:
The word that has been translated throughout the Bible as a masculine, singular God, could also have been translated as Heavenly Beings, Angels, or even the goddess Astarte.1
Wow.
Okay.
In light of this etymological gem, I considered using the third-person plural pronoun “they” in my poem to refer to the compassionate deity Hagar met in the desert. But on reflection, I opted for “we,” which has a more inclusive and warmer resonance that aligns nicely with the word’s origin.
I cheated a little on the form, too
A pantoum is a poetic form in which a series of 8 lines are repeated in a set pattern, creating a dreamy incantatory effect.
Traditionally the lines would also follow a rhyme scheme, a requirement which I’ve dropped for my purposes. (More poetic license.)
But that’s not the interesting part. This is: The form’s origins date back to a 15th Century Malaysian oral tradition, and pantoums at that time, were meant to be sung.
That’s not terribly surprising. The word sonnet, for example, means song. And poetry, known for its musicality, rhythm, and rhyme, was originally meant to be spoken aloud or sung. Writing and reading poems is a relatively modern innovation.
Filtering lines from Genesis through a poetic form that is meant for carrying stories aloud in song feels restorative to me. After all, the biblical legends that make up Sarah, Abraham, and Hagar’s stories were part of a centuries-long oral tradition before they were ever committed to papyrus and parchment, let alone paper.
1 story, 2 pantoums, 3+ millennia (more or less) apart
Here are two pantoums I wrote based on the story of Hagar wandering with her son in the desert.
Pantoum #1: “He Sent Her Away” is set thousands of years in the past, in the desert wilderness, when Hagar was desperate, desolate, and facing what seemed like certain death for her and her son.
He Sent Her Away
©️ “He Sent Her Away,” Copyright Tzivia Gover, Third House Moon, LLC, all rights reserved.
Woodpile Moon Axe (Forsaken)
Pantoum #2: “Woodpile Moon Axe” is set in New England, just a few decades ago, when I was lost in a wilderness of emotional pain when I faced a long separation from my daughter.
©️ “Woodpile Moon Axe (Foresaken),” Copyright Tzivia Gover, Third House Moon, LLC, all rights reserved.
Pick up your pen and write in one of these upcoming workshops
Dreaming on the Page Writing Circle Tues., Nov. 14.
Discover how the subconscious can serve your writing (in any genre–and for writers at all levels), and receive dream-inspired prompts to spark original, authentic writing. Tues., Nov. 14, 11 a.m.-1:30 p.m. US ET. Accessible pricing: Standard $45; Low/Limited Income/ $25; Angel Price $65.
Stay (Cozy) at Home and Write: A Weekend Retreat Online
Friday-Sunday Jan. 19-21 2024.
In this low-cost Write-at-Home retreat, you’ll receive optional writing prompts, structured writing time, virtual check-ins, and the opportunity to write and share your work with an online community. Accessible pricing: Standard $55; Low/Fixed Income $25; Angel Price $75. Learn more or Join Stay (Cozy) at Home and Write.
I’ve laced up my metaphoric sneakers and am in the midst of a poem-a-day month-long writing marathon to raise funds for new immigrants in my community. You can learn more and make a donation to this worthy cause here.
The Life of H: Sarah, Reimagined is a free newsletter. There is also a paid version that includes bonus content. Upgrade to a paid annual subscription and get a FREE signed copy of Dreaming on the Page (mailed to US addresses only).
If a paid subscription is out of your price range, but you’d like the benefits of being a paid subscriber, email me for the link to “pay what you can.”
I’m dreaming with you,
The Encylopedia Britannica
Tzivia, Fabulous poems. Your ability to blend the historical with the contemporary, as in "He Sent Her Away", always astonishes me. And the repetition of lines in both works so well to communicate their emotional intensity.